There are several reasons that can lead a mother to decide to wean your baby. If after having assessed and consulted in a breastfeeding support group - in case there is a problem that could be put on track -, the mother continues with the idea of weaning her child, it is best to start small.
Many mothers decide to start weaning first eliminating night shots. We have talked to a lactation consultant to find out how to carry out this process in a respectful way for the baby, and these are the keys he has given us.
Weaning, better little by little
We talked about night weaning with Macarena Ruiz, doula, lactation consultant, creator of the Facebook group Online Breastfeeding Advisors and director of breastfeeding courses.
Before sharing the advice you have given us, it should be emphasized that the weaning should not happen suddenly, but it must be a process by which the mother or the baby gradually reduce their intake until they are definitively eliminated.
There are mothers who, before weaning completely, opt first to wean at night. If this is your case, Macarena advises to rely on a lactation consultant throughout the process and keep two issues in mind:
- If you wean to believe that this way your baby will sleep through the night, Macarena reminds us that the dream is an evolutionary process and that nighttime awakenings are normal, whether breastfeeding or drinking bottles.
- Night weaning should not be carried out before 12-18 months. Due to its nutritional and developmental needs, breast milk is still the main food of a baby of this age, so the adviser advises never to wean before this age.
Once the decision to wean at night is made, it is recommended to follow a series of guidelines taking into account that this process will not be fast or possibly easy1. Keep the child's feelings in mind
The child is not the one who has chosen to wean, so we must understand the moments of frutration and anger that could occur during the process.
"As mothers, we have to do a great job of containment and patience. We cannot afford to lose our nerves with the baby, scream or scold him. It is a difficult situation for him and we must handle it in a way absolutely respectful"- Macarena reminds us.
"Even if we do our best to carry out a respectful weaning, we must know that it will not be a happy weaning because most likely our son will cry and have a bad time"
2. Do not let go of our own feelings
It is possible that during weaning we feel both guilt and equal relief. The advisor explains that both feelings are normal, and that we should not be hard on ourselves. It is understandable that we want to close a stage and that should not make us feel bad.
3. Talk to our son and explain what will happen
Macarena advises us to talk to our son and explain at all times what will happen, how and when we will start, what steps we will take ... If our child understands the concept of "pact", we can reach an agreement with him to try to make the process easier.
"We can tell you that after a certain time you will not be able to breastfeed. We will explain it to you in simple words or using the story of the" tired tit ", who also needs to go to sleep. This is an excellent resource to accompany the children" - explains the advisor.
4. Not any time is worth to start weaning!
A move, the arrival of a brother, the beginning of the nursery ... Any major change in family life is not considered advisable to start a process as delicate as this.
5. Extra dose of pampering
Let's compensate our baby with doses extra hugs, pampering and kissing, so that the loss of the tit at night is accepted to a better degree.
6. Offer liquids or food
When our child has an awakening during the night and seeks breastfeeding, we offer alternatives such as water, milk or any other food.
7. Uncollect, if the child accepts
Sometimes it works change the bed boy and take him to sleep with the older brothers, if he had them. The excitement and enthusiasm for being older and sleeping with them can make the process easier.
But Macarena upsets us that this step should be taken only if the child is especially excited, because force weaning also leaving the colecho behind It could make a change too abrupt.
8. "Parent plan" or involve the father in weaning
This option usually works very well when the couple is very involved and is aware of what the night weaning process entails. It would consist of the father being the one who holds the baby when he wakes up, supports him, pampering him, entertains him ...
"We can implement this resource in several ways. One of them could be making the baby sleep next to the father instead of the mother's side. Or even the mother goes to sleep in another room" - advises Macarena .
9. Go back and stop when we need it
A weaning process is not always easy, that's why we must not be uncompromising and believe that once started, we must not back down.
"We must allow ourselves to go back or stop when we need it, because no solution is magical, and weaning is a hard process for both the baby and the mother. If difficult situations or complicated nights occur, we can breastfeed again, even if only be it a moment, or even to suspend weaning if we do not see ourselves with the strength to move forward "- advises the advisor.
WHO recommends exclusive breastfeeding during the first six months of the baby, and continue with it until at least two years. It also recognizes that it is a child's right and as such we must protect it.
But when situations arise that, as mothers, lead us to make this decision, it is best to do it in the most respectful way possible, avoiding harmful advice and being guided and accompanied in a process that, as we said at the beginning, may not be as easy as we initially thought.
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