We participate today in the second part of the interview that Babies and more is doing to psychotherapist Enrique Blay, specialist in the emotions of babies and all their sensitive and psychological world.
If in our first conversation we wanted to talk about the importance of the experiences that the baby has inside the womb and about how his psychological development begins with conception, this time we wanted to go forward in time, growing with our emotional baby, to go understanding better the functioning of their feelings and the imprint they will leave in their future life.
What is the father's ideal role during pregnancy?
The role of the father has two aspects. On the one hand, knowing the importance of the mother's emotional state, which the baby perceives, must ensure that her partner feels supported, understood, pampered, in a word, loved. On the other hand, knowing the great perceptual abilities of the intrauterine baby, specifically the auditory ones, the father can initiate the emotional bond by talking to his son about the mother's belly, caressing him, sending him his best thoughts of love and affection.
Are there confirmable data on the possibility of this communication?
For man it is a new way to get involved in the paternal experience, from the conception of his son.Experiments have been made in which it is shown that the baby, once born, recognizes his father's voice among that of other men and calms more in his arms than in those of another.
And what should be its role in the first years of a child's life?
The father would have to continue in the direction of making his partner feel completely loved, since his emotional state remains fundamental with respect to the emotional state of his baby, and this includes respect for the parenting guidelines adopted by the mother, such as breastfeeding, colecho, crying attention.
And as for the child?
Regarding your child, live an intense fatherhood. Kiss him, hug him, bathe him, take care of him, play with him, dedicate quality time. In the first years, emotional bonds and forms of communication settle.
What does a baby feel when she is born?
At the time of birth, the baby is a complete human being, with the particularity of his Emotional Perception. That is, able to perceive everything that happens and transform it into feelings, emotions. The baby has been nine months in paradise, floating in the amniotic fluid, perceiving the love of his mother, protected and fed without any effort. Suddenly, he is "expelled," through a dark and narrow path to an outside and unknown world.
Will your birth influence your psyche?
Both the experience of the birth process and the way it is received at birth will leave a deep mark on your psyche. A footprint that includes the perception of the world to which it arises, a pleasant, peaceful, welcoming, affective, loving world or, on the contrary, an unpleasant, violent, aggressive, painful world. A perception that will accompany us the rest of our lives.
How should the ideal birth of babies be?
Here there is enough scientific evidence, to affirm that the best birth is what Dr. Michel Odent calls "mammalian birth", which we could define is the one that does not have external interventions and leaves them to be the mother's and baby's own bodies Take it to fruition. Leave what he describes as a "hormone cocktail". Their experiences and research show that a delivery without interventions, allows positive emotional experiences, even pleasant, although in our culture today it is so difficult to accept the relationship childbirth and pleasure. Birth is an intense emotional experience, both for the mother and the baby. What the mother feels is felt by the baby and therefore we could ask ourselves first, what is the best way to face childbirth so that it is a rewarding emotional experience for the mother, and by resonance for her baby.
What practices should be avoided when receiving a baby in the world?
We should ask ourselves what is the best way to receive the baby at birth. Above all it is very important not to cut the umbilical cord before it stops beating. The baby, at birth, has the airways filled with amniotic fluid and the oxygen he needs to live reaches him through the umbilical cord. Cutting it before the baby can breathe on its own is to lead to suffocation.
And what practices should be encouraged? It is essential that the newborn baby and in the later hours remain with his mother without being separated from her. Placing the newborn baby with his mother causes the final segregation of the cocktail of hormones, such as oxytocin, the love hormone, related to pleasure and attachment, endorphins (endogenous morphine) and prolactin that prevents bleeding, promotes the detachment of the placenta and starts the mechanisms of breastfeeding. In the few occasions in which a respected birth, mammal, presents difficulties that put at risk the health of mother and baby, usual difficulties in interventional deliveries, we have a fantastic medicine that solves the problem. Welcome the “needy” caesarean sections since they save the lives of babies or mothers. Let us reject “unnecessary” caesarean sections that place mothers and babies at unnecessary risk. The emotions babies feel at the time of birth or his experiences from the womb with his father will leave a mark. If they suffer they can heal emotionally, but without the slightest doubt, give them the best possible birth, surrounded by love and respect, without unnecessary violence or separation, they will be the basis of a psychological development full of peace and happiness. We will continue with the interview with psychotherapist Enrique Blay, which is explaining to us these exciting realities, to, accompanied by their experience, arrive on the next issues to talk about parenting and education. In Babies and more | "Psychological development begins at the time of conception." Interview with Enrique Blay, The emotions of babies
What should be done is to immediately place the baby on the mother's chest and wait for the umbilical cord to stop beating on its own. Nature is wise and this happens as soon as the baby can breathe on his own.It is currently known that a natural, mammalian, non-interventionist birth is the safest and healthiest way to experience a birth, both for the mother and the baby, both physically and psychologically.
