It is well known that children learn, above all, by observation and imitation of the world in which they live and how the people around them behave, whose main source of reference is parents.
In the last few days my two children have shown me that Children do what they see, Both as for well and for worse.
For ten days my 19 month old son wants me to breastfeed his baby doll, which leads everywhere. He is determined to give him his chest at all hours and it is not enough for him to pretend to breastfeed, I have to lift my shirt, put his nipple in his mouth and make a noise as if I am actually giving it to him. He supervises the operation very attentively, as worried that his baby is fed correctly and for as long as he needs, correcting me if necessary because he does not like the position in which I have put him or because I want to finish the game time before what he considers appropriate.
Sometimes he decides to breastfeed in tandem with him, other times he simply observes the shot and other times, he removes and puts the doll while alternating with him as if he were truly competing with another brother.
I have no doubt that my young son has incorporated breastfeeding as normal in his life, understanding that babies need their mothers' breast. Since our doll has no one to breastfeed him, he generously yields to his own mother to do the homework.
I must admit that I am excited that my little one has learned this concept. If we maintain breastfeeding until I begin to have memory As if to remember it in the future, my son will grow up knowing what a breastfeeding is. It will have a solid cultural reference, will consider breastfeeding as normal not only for babies but for older children, you will not have those taboos or limitations full of prejudices that predominate today. And that reference will also help you when, one day, you become a father (if you have children one day!).
If most of the children of now what they have seen is how a bottle is given, if all the dolls come with one, if they see how their little brothers take it, we will continue in the culture that we have had until now. If, on the contrary, it happens to me like my little one, they will change their perception of how to take care of a baby, the breast will be normal and the bottle will be the exception. And in a natural way, without having to do anything but let things flow.
About two weeks ago I had to take my four-year-old son in the car, the two of us alone, a situation that is not usual, since we almost always take the four and drive the father of the creatures or if I take it I am because I go alone. As soon as I got on he said "What are you doing mom sit in your seat, that is not your place but that of dad, the driver is dad!"Then, as I did not opt for the streets we usually go through we were going to another place, raising the tone he told me"Mom, you're doing fatal, how bad you drive! But what are you doing ?!"
I did not expect! It is clear that although we are peaceful people at the wheel, to our eldest son come the comments we usually make in the car about driving other cars. Just as it imitates the gesture of opening the car, inserting the key and starting, putting on the belt, putting the gear and moving the steering wheel, imitates everything else.
He has always been interested in vehicles, most days when we park he slides to the driver's seat to simulate driving, so I suppose we should have foreseen soaking up everything he perceives when we get in the car, including conversations . That what for us may be unimportant comments, for him they have become an example of attitudes behind the wheel, although in this case they are not the most appropriate.
It has even ended up assuming, based on seeing it, the role of the driver father and the mother who travels in the passenger seat, a scene that is sure to be repeated in many families and that may explain, at least in part, that it is transmitted from generation to generation
Although the two experiences have made me think, obviously it is this second example, that of the imitation of less positive behaviors, which has made me think more. Or rather remember to what extent children learn from us silently, even from our most insignificant gestures.
Undoubtedly, to assume that children do what they see is to assume a great responsibility. Educating by example is not always easy, especially when adults, I first, sometimes ask children things that even we do. The positive is that although we often do things wrong and they witness it, we can also teach them to rectify.
