The 13 daily discussions you will have with your partner when you are a father

With the light that only sheds time, the discussions I had with my partner before being a father now seem tremendously trivial. That if we stay more with your friends than with mine, that if you do not take me to romantic places, that if I want to go to the beach and you to the mountain ... Blessed problem!

And when you are a father, the focus of the couple discussions completely changes: Now they focus on aspects of vital importance and decide who of the two will be able to sleep, shower, eat quietly or even have a second to hear oneself think. If I could travel in time, I would lose all those other discussions in exchange for five more minutes in the shower.

For the record, my partner and I have a good fatherhood and we love each other enough to have these discussions almost always with a smile in our mouths. Let's say they are rather affectionate dialectical struggles, but you fight after all. Let us begin:

It's your turn to get up

Probably the mother of all parental arguments: who has to get up when the baby wakes up at night. "Honey I have an important meeting tomorrow" - "Yes, but it's the third time I wake up" - "Ok, but you give him breakfast and sleep 10 more minutes" is the quick negotiation that can take place in the 10 seconds after hearing your baby cry from his room.

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With you eat better

A compliment with very bad intentions. As my mother said: in community do not show ability. So when it comes to eating quietly, everything goes. Because no matter how well a child eats, no matter how fun it becomes, from time to time you feel like your food is not cold when you finally get your tooth.

That poop bears your name

Changing diapers is something that at first is carried without problem, but as the baby begins to eat as an adult, his bowel movements begin to be more ... "juicy." So as soon as we see that it starts to make strength, begins the "dance" of who has to open the surprise package. More than one parent has an internal account of how many diapers he has changed and he always believes that they are more than the ones his partner has changed.

Don't give him that to eat yet

Incredible as it may seem, it is possible that the two parents are "irresponsible" with feeding the baby and mutually recriminate things ignoring their own slips. "Isn't it too early to give him ham?" - "But if you gave him a spoonful of your custard yesterday!" - "He was screaming at me" - "Well, he makes me look when he sees me cut Ham!". And so on to infinity.

I need a shower

When you are father there is no time that you treasure more than the time you spend in the shower. Hot water and the inability to meet the needs of your little one; even their cries, if any, are mitigated by running water.

That is why showering is the most precious currency. Do not rule out discussing which of the two smells worse or has the dirtiest hair, or ending the little one in the bathtub because if not, there is no way.

But how you dress him like this!

It is likely that one of the two members of the couple has more pleasure to dress, although it is enough that he simply believes that this is so to be horrified every time the other puts the set inappropriate for the occasion or does not combine colors or textures properly . Do not you see that the tie that you have put in your hair does not hit the rest?

Won't it be cold?

Because that is another, my partner and I never agree on the number of layers: when I want to warm her more it turns out that it is hot, and when I take off her coat (or I forget it) it is always colder. I must have the thermostat broken. And at home more of the same, one seems to be hot in the baby's room, and the other cold. And the next day, in reverse. Party insured.

Go take him to sleep

With this I broke my rule of not showing ability, and my little girl has taken pleasure in my arms when it comes to falling asleep, but don't think that frees us from arguments. “Do you already take her to sleep?” - “But if she isn't sleepy yet” - “You say that because there are 10 minutes left before the game ends” - “Nooo, not at all…”

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I take a nap

Normally, babies have a good habit of napping, at which time parents take the opportunity to do the same. But nevertheless, when for some reason the child skips it, it is time for parents to play "who is more tired" to see who the "lucky" is to take care of him while the other throws himself into the arms of Morpheus.

We have not put the washing machine

Or we have not washed the dishes, or we have not cleaned the house, or we have not made the purchase ... Suddenly, We have a fervor for parents in the pluralistic majestática when it comes to notifying the other that there is nothing in the fridge and not a clean spoon to give the baby porridge. The perfect balance between how hard it is to admit that you have not done it yourself and the unwillingness to tell the other that you have not done it either.

Your mother / father could keep their opinions

Do you remember when the discussions were about the remote control?

Oh, the grandparents. We could not live without them, but sometimes you would prefer to keep their opinions a little, and especially those of your in-laws. Classic pearls like "this girl is hungry, are you sure your milk is good?", "Why don't you wet the bottle in condensed milk?" or "Oh, oh, if you give him food without crushing, he will choke," which implies an immediate start of the corresponding father.

Now don't let him sleep!

That little powerful guy at seven in the afternoon who falls asleep. The father who is not for many parties either. That temptation to let him sleep. That nap to brief time. That baby who wakes up as if he had slept all night. And let's see who sleeps now while they yell at you: I told you!

Do you want not to disturb him before sleeping?

The other side of the coin: when one of the parents has not been home all day and arrives wanting to play with the little one, who was about to fall asleep after much effort. And it reveals! And then he says he is very tired of having been out all day! And it leaves you with the baby with eyes like plates in arm!

So I could go on for a while longer, but I think you get the idea. In the end it is take life with humor and be mutually understanding: Raising a child is a matter of two and, in addition, although now lazy, within 10 years you would give your life to go back to cradle your baby, feed him and even change a diaper!

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